WITH APOLOGIES TO THE BARD

Friends, Tea partiers, Republicans, listen up;
I come to praise Romney, not to bury him.
The flip flops that men do live after them;
The rigid opinions are oft interred with their bones;
So let it be with Romney.

The noble Perry
Hath told you Romney was a flip flopper:
If it were so, it would not be a grievous fault;
And grievously hath Romney answer'd it.
Here, under leave of Perry and the rest, --
For Perry is an honourable man;
So are they all, all honourable men and one woman --
Strange creature though she is,
Come I to speak in Romney's defense

He was for Romneycare before it became Obamacare,
now he doth vow to smite it on his first day as Emperor.
But Perry says he was just ambitious;
And Perry is an honourable man.

He hath many women cheering his love of Roe and Wade
Till the Evangelicals have cried No! Romney has wept
And cried: "Out with this noxious pair!
No child shall be untimely ripped!"
But Perry says he was just ambitious;
And Perry is an honorable man.

Whose job outsourcings did the Romney coffers fill:
Upwards of three hundred millions in gold,
And thousands of flesh shorn from their labors;
Did this in Romney seem ambitious?
When that the poor have cried, Romney hath not wept:
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet Perry says he was ambitious;
And Perry is an honourable man.

You all did see that on the Detroit factories
I thrice presented him an auto bailout
Which he did thrice refuse: was this ambition?
Yet Perry says he was ambitious;
And, sure, Perry is an honourable man.

I speak not to disprove what Romney spoke,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
He first said, "I doth support stimulus economus",
Till wondrous one percent said "Fie on false gifts".

You all did love him once, --not without cause:
What cause withholds you, then, to mourn for him?
O judgement, thou art fled to brutish candidates,
And men have lost their reason over tea and sophistry
--Bear with me;
My heart is in the ring there with Romney's hat
And I must pause till it comes back to me.